I was supposed to post this before my wedding, but there were many things on hold at that time. It has been really stressful months. I didn’t have the time to update my blog much but I was trying my best to stick to the bunch of TV series (comedy ones) and some books to lighten up my mood and help me forget for few hours a day that I was gonna get married.
I do love life educating books yet I didn’t believe in marriage education that much. The logic behind that in my mind was like “I don’t need book to teach me how to love, respect, care for my family” but man there were a lot of things to learn, If not learn then at least remind us of what we already know.
The first book I got from a colleague at work is “Why Men love Bitches!” by Sherry Argov and unlike what the cover says a bitch here has a different perspective than what we are familiar with. The writer describes her as an independent woman who knows how to make herself happy and at the same time maintain a strong loving relationship with her partner.
I do love this book because it gave so many helpful situations from women of all kinds, although most of the scenarios were common sense or I already came across them I found myself happy with the strong reminder and in some cases wondering how she’s gonna react in such situation! It will help you to keep hold of what you like and want in your life and never to let this new relationship with a man makes you forget yourself and be what she calls a “nice woman” who is easy to deceive and willing to naively give all she got sacrificing her time and energy
Things I loved about this book are:
1- It gradually guides you through your relationship starting from date one and how its enough to have popcorn for a meal so you build a solid appreciation and respect for the coming meals lol
2- There are couple of comparison tables through the book drawing both scenes on what a nice girl and a bitch would do in each situation. Its scary to know you might be too nice without noticing sometimes and how its perceived by the opposite sex is even scarier!
3- when the writer gives a tip; she explains the logic behind! For example, ….. focused lots of her efforts to explain why its important to have a job of your own and that independence will not only keep the guy unable to predict your next move but even the richest men will sense your value and your addition to the house. Now before I thought rich men wouldn’t bother paying us for a lifetime long, not seeing the inner damage of image it can give to a woman.
The second book is a one I wanted to read long time ago but forgot all about it until recently when I was wedding shopping in Dubai. I couldn’t resist not buying new books and getting scolded by mom to focus on more important matters at that moment lol
Since the writer Steve Harvey is not a writer but a comedian he stated that the book will not be the same of that of a writer’s. It was simple, well organized and sweet. The book is a guide from a man to women on how to understand men explained in the shortest way possible. Through the book I loved these two facts as they worked in making me more realistic and more understanding to not expect a woman’s behavior from a man.
Two facts I loved:
1- A man is a good one if he feels good about himself and that happens when he knows: who he is, what he does and how much he earns.
2- If a man loves you, he will: give you a title (my wife, my fiancé, my girlfriend …etc), provide for you (money, food, shelter… etc) and protect you (he will not let any man harm you in any way)
I felt like it’s a father daughter kind of message and it didn’t miss a little sprinkle of his sense of humor. It’s a nice addition to build yourself a full picture beside the previous book. And now when I have feminine doubts on whether my husband cares for me or loves me I just remember those guidelines and drift away from all this negativity lol.
From my personal view, these two books are just a basic start for anyone. There are hundred of ways to learn and educate yourself and you have to pick the most comfortable ones for you, ones you think are interesting and will add to your balance of information. All in all, try to read books and learn from life as it’s the best teacher you will ever encounter and never take advices from people who are not professional in family relationships, these are serious stuff and we should handle them in a more serious mindset.
And remember, marriage education still goes on even after getting married :)
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| Interesting fact from Women's Day.com : "Wedding and engagement rings have been worn on the fourth finger of the left hand since ancient times. The Romans believed a vein in this particular finger, called "vena amoris" (a.k.a. the "vein of love"), leads directly to the heart." |
Peace,
Amna Al Dhaheri
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